Memory Box Blankets

I love doing anything I can to give back to the baby loss community. I myself have suffered 2 miscarriages, and 2 losses after birth due to prematurity and birth defects. I crocheted these small blankets to be included in memory box programs. I did a giveaway on my facebook page and these are going to Elijah's Tropical Sunshine and Angel Wings Birth & Bereavement. 

I know someday a mother is going to hold her small beautiful baby in one of these blankets in a hospital somewhere far away. It's going to be the saddest day of her life, and I hope taking this blanket home with her brings her a lifetime of memories and comfort. I slept with David's blanket inside my shirt for a long time and now it and Alyssa's blanket hold a special place in my cabinet. 

In Loving Memory of Alyssa & David 

I talked to a lady today who has the same problem i do, gastroparesis. She told me that she started out just like me with 2-3 major flare ups a year, and now 8 years later she is dependent on a feeding tube. She told me it's a horrible miserable life and she doesn't wish it on anyone. She also told me she wouldn't sugar coat it, that I need to prepare myself because it's overwhelming and just gets worse. As depressing as it is, I'm thankful someone was just honest and told me how it is instead of hearing "the dr's aren't treating you properly, you aren't on the right meds, blah blah". She told me, no one understands exactly how miserable it is unless you've had it. 

Plain and simple some medical conditions can't be cured or even have very many treatments. This is my life, but it's NOT the one I chose.

I am praying that I will be one of the lucky ones, that there is a treatment found in my lifetime that will be able to help me and so many others like me who suffer. I'm a wife, a mommy, I can't just lay down and be ok with no treatments, we need to fight for awareness and research!

Gastroparesis

The point in me starting this blog is to really document my battle with gastroparesis or just GP. I've only been diagnosed with the last year really, and before that I went undiagnosed and sick for about another year. It's been a miserable ride, but I am thankful that my flare up's are usually cured with a hospital stay and lot's of IV meds. But there are also the times I'm sick and throwing up on a daily basis for weeks at a time. Currently I am in a "good" time controlled by meds and a very limited diet. 

I spent 4 days in the hospital just a couple weeks ago when my flare up turned bad. I had been throwing up for 2 days when I was unable to even keep water down. At this point I became dehydrated and had to go to the hospital. At the time they admitted me I also had a major panic attack with chest pain, so I had to go through many, many blood draws to make sure I hadn't had a heart attack (which I didn't). I was there for 4 days getting IV fluids and anti nausea meds in my IV. Finally with Reglan I've been able to stop throwing up and can eat semi normal, even though I don't have a big appetite ever. 

P.S. Even though this blog is about GP, I'm going to let my blog post wander like my mind! Scary though haha I'm going to blog a little bit of everything =) 

Here is the definition of gastroparesis according to Medtronic.

Definition

Gastroparesis is a stomach disorder in which food is digested more slowly than normal. In a healthy digestive system, strong muscular contractions move food from the stomach through the digestive tract. With gastroparesis, however, the stomach muscles work poorly (or not at all), thus preventing the stomach from emptying properly. For some people, this condition results in serious nausea and vomiting that cannot be adequately controlled with standard medications.

Currently Reading: Delirium by Lauren Oliver

Delirium - Lauren Oliver

I am reading Delirium by Lauren Oliver with Erica from Silly Socks N Things! As you will learn, I am a book addict. I am addicted to reading books on the app Scribd, even though I do also read the old fashion page turning types of books as well. There is nothing like the feel of unlimited books for $8.99 a month. Sigh. Pure bliss. 

Who am I?

Who am I you ask yourself as you see this pretty blank blog. I'm a mother, wife, employee, patient, baby loss mom, affected by chronic illness, with a passion for reading and writing! I love to crotchet!